18Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. 20Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. 21Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.
Interesting Words
fitting
(ἀνῆκεν – Greek) – anēken ► verb: is due, becoming, suitable, proper, from ana and heko; to attain to, i.e. be proper – Eph 5:4; Philemon 1:8;
embittered
(πικραίνεσθε – Greek) – pikrainesthe ► verb: 2nd person plural (you), imperative, [middle or passive], make bitter, embitter; passive: grow angry or harsh – Rev 8:11, 10:9, 10;
obedient
(ὑπακούετε – Greek) – hypakouete ► verb: 2nd person plural (you), imperative, from hupo and akouo; to hear under, i.e. to listen attentively; by implication, to heed or conform to a command or authority – Matt 8:27; Mark 1:27; Rom 6:12, 16, 17; Phil 2:12; Heb 11:8;
well-pleasing
(εὐάρεστόν – Greek) – euareston ► noun: acceptable, well-pleasing (especially to God), grateful, from eu and arestos: fully agreeable – Rom 12:1, 2, 14:18; 2Cor 5:9; Phil 4:18;
exasperate
(ἐρεθίζετε – Greek) – erethizete ► verb: 2nd person plural (you), imperative, to stir up, arouse to anger, provoke, irritate, incite, from a presumed prolonged form of eris; to stimulate – 2Cor 9:2
lose heart
(ἀθυμῶσιν – Greek) – athymōsin ► verb: to lose heart, be despondent, be disheartened, from a compound of “a” [negative] and thumos [wrath, passion]; to be spiritless, i.e. disheartened – used once in the NT, here in Colossians.
Cross References
22Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30because we are members of His body. 31FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. 32This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
▪︎ Titus_2:1-8
3Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
6Likewise urge the young men to be sensible; 7in all things show yourself to be an example of good deeds, with purity in doctrine, dignified, 8sound in speech which is beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about us.
▪︎ 1Peter_3:1-12
7You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
8To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; 9not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
10For,
“THE ONE WHO DESIRES LIFE, TO LOVE AND SEE GOOD DAYS,
MUST KEEP HIS TONGUE FROM EVIL AND HIS LIPS FROM SPEAKING DECEIT.
11“HE MUST TURN AWAY FROM EVIL AND DO GOOD;
HE MUST SEEK PEACE AND PURSUE IT.
12“FOR THE EYES OF THE LORD ARE TOWARD THE RIGHTEOUS,
AND HIS EARS ATTEND TO THEIR PRAYER,
BUT THE FACE OF THE LORD IS AGAINST THOSE WHO DO EVIL.”
1. Consider Paul’s choice of words in the first paragraph, how would you summarize his message?
▪︎ Can’t we all just get along, Lord willing, in the fear of Christ.
▪︎ Do what is appropriate, proper, fitting, obedient, well-pleasing to the Lord.
▪︎ Functional, looking out for the best interest of others (Phil 2:3-4); so that no one is embittered, stirred up, or irritated.
▪︎ So that no one is stressed to the point of loosing heart.
2. Some of Paul’s points can be misunderstood. What are one or two? How can these misunderstandings be resolved or prevented?
▪︎ It sounds like we are milk toast, walking on egg shells.
▪︎ The key is for everyone to be “in Christ”, thus prayer may be in order, but still there may be renegades.
▪︎ Confess sin and repent, so as to keep all on a spiritual trajectory in all aspects.
▪︎ Refer to the cross references for further in-depth study.
3. Ephesians_5:19-33 (and other cross references above) are a similar but more extensive. Consider the similarities and differences. List several insights you see.
▪︎ The detailed challenges are in Ephesians, which if adhered to, the results will be similar to what is in Colossians.
▪︎ Husbands are called to imitate Christ. If that is done, life will look a lot like whats described in Colossians.
▪︎ All should submit to each other as if to the Lord (Eph 5:21).
▪︎ Christ’s love should permeate every relationship.
▪︎ Realize that our family relationship reflects our relationship to Christ and the church (His bride).
▪︎ We are flawed individuals (sin) and require much patience (forgiveness).
▪︎ Set your hope on Christ (Col 1:27), not in riches, adornments (1Peter 3:5).
▪︎ The word of God needs also be preeminent.
▪︎ Be godly, modest, sober-minded, pure, sensible, nonretaliatory.
4. If you were to prioritize the most important points, what would you consider to be essential and why?
▪︎ Hope in Christ. He is the model for all of us.
▪︎ Live godly lives, a fragrant offering to God.
▪︎ Submit to each other.
▪︎ Put the word of God at the center of life.
5. What are the different motivations people have for working on these qualities?
▪︎ To please God and honor Him.
▪︎ To be at peace with God and everyone.
▪︎ Personal growth.
▪︎ To have a happy family.
▪︎ To set a good example for others in the church.